No New News

Just an update to let everyone know there is still no news of a baby. Stay tuned.

The Countdown Begins

After visiting the Dr. today we now have a plan. As of today I am 4 1/2 cm and 95% effaced. Sorry for those of you who think that was too much info. Dr. Cassidy can't believe we are still walking around! :) We went ahead and planned an induction for Monday, March 9th but know we could go before that day. Of course we would like if nature would take it course but we are also okay with setting a date to deliver. What is known is that Baby Berry will be entering the world in 7 days or less. Knowing our history we will probably go to Monday. :)

False Alarm

So I guess the contractions were another false alarm. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and we shall see what is going on and begin to talk about a plan if I continue to be in the waiting period. My official due date is March 11th and for those of you wise crackers who thought it would be so funny if I went past my due date, I am seriously considering hunting you all down. It is a good thing to be this far, it just seems unreal. We will keep you posted.

Anna

First of all, we are still waiting, no baby news yet. :)

On a deeper note: A year and a half ago I meet an amazing woman named Kate. We meet for the reason that no one every wants to meet someone; the death of a child. There are only a few reasons why I am where I am today in this grief journey and Kate is high on that list. Sadly there is comfort is being with another mother who has lost. One never wishes anyone to travel the journey of losing a child, but Kate has taken her grief and done amazing things with it. So today the Berry family honors the life of Anna who at this moment is leading our boys through the beautiful fields of Heaven and showing them the way. Anna is as much a part of our hearts as Jacob and Caden and we thank the Kelty's for sharing their ability to recover from loss so we can recover too. Anna we love you and can't wait to meet you someday.

Still here . . . still waiting . . .

Just another update to say we are still waiting. The more days the better but I must say we are getting very anxious to meet this baby. We will keep you posted.

Waiting . . .

Just wanted to post an update saying I am still at home waiting for the arrival of this baby. I guess he/she is just not ready. I have not been cleared to go back to work so I spend much of my time recovering and organizing. Hopefully we will be posting photos soon!

A Cute Story

This was so cute I had to share it with all of you who follow this blog.

My friend Sherri lives in Canada and they came to visit me a couple of weeks ago. This is a conversation she had with her son while she was reading my blog one day.

Nathan: "Who's baby is that turning on there?
Sherri: "Alicia's. Do you think she will have a boy or girl."
Nathan: "A Boy! And his name will be Kai!"

So there is one person's prediction! :)


He also keeps talking about how Alicia has to lie on the couch so her baby doesn't come out.
And he keeps talking about how Alicia's mom called him MARVIN!!! He always says Marvin really loud and with a huge smile on his face.

This made me smile and I had to share it with all. I am happy to share with Nathan that I no longer have to lie on the couch so my baby doesn't come out. I am now considered a completely normal 36 week pregnant woman. We have been counting some irregular contractions today but nothing too dramatic. We will keep you all updated!

Officially Nesting

Still here, no baby news yet. However, many of you would be proud of my mini projects that I have been tackling. I have now officially organized every closet we own even going as far as washing every button down shirt Paul owns, ironed it and organized it by color. I do believe I have found the real meaning of the word "nesting"? It is amazing to be a more normal pregnant woman. I think most woman would be very tired by the 36 week but I have been renewed with energy at the mere mention of cleaning the house.

Friday

Everything went well again today at my weekly doctor's appointment. At this point in time I have been given pretty much all of my freedoms back. Don't worry I won't get too extreme and start doing jumping jacks. I still have to take it very slow as my legs and muscles are still adjusting to movement. In a week, I already am beginning to feel a little stronger. Now I just need to not overdue it. It is amazing that we are at this point and feel very blessed to be here. We will continue to keep you posted on anything new.

Target

What would this world be like without Target? I love going there and today Paul took me for the first time in a long time. I took one lap around the store, went to lunch and then promptly went back home where I collapsed and took a two hour nap. I guess that wore me out. :)

Just wanted to post something today as many of you comment that you get concerned if there are too many days between the posts. Still hanging in there and anticipating the next few weeks.

The Silence in the Shadow

So the last few days have been interesting. I now take time to sit on my couch and view the room around me. Instead of seeing the cracks on the ceiling or my empty beam now that Christmas is past, I see the magazines that line the floor or the dust that has built up on top of the table. This makes me smile as I realize it does not matter what position I am in, I will always find something to fixate on. Those who know me well, know how dangerous this can be. Slowly I have been finding my "land legs" as I make my way back into vertical world. It is strange to go from such strict bed rest to so many changes. I still have to take it easy and spend most of my time on this couch. However, the kitchen is now void of those pesky daily crumbs and there is a load of laundry cleanly retiring by my feet as I write. It is these small things that make my day go by faster and I anticipate life beyond the confines of couch sitting and "being careful." I have learned much from this time spent lying still and have realized in the stillness is where I have learned the most. As happy as I am to be up, I also realize that I will never again have the time I have had to reflect and drink deeply from the quiet. There is a song you can now find on this blog that is called "I Believe in Love". The chorus says "I believe in the sun even when it is not shinning, I believe in love even when I don't feel it and I believe in God even when he is SILENT." The song was inspired by the very quote you find in the chorus. It was etched into the wall of a concentration camp by a man who spent the remainder of his days in a dark stone room. I don't know about you but when I am in my darkest times, I am not usually praising God. I continue to take from this song and begin to find what it means for life as well as ponder what it means to have your character formed in the valley instead of the mountain top.

A New Woman

Today I am a new woman! I have been given a window of freedom and I define how far I open that window. :) After my doctor appointment today, I have been released to do a few more things. What are these things you may ask? 1. I am sitting up to type this. 2. I can go out to eat with my husband tomorrow night. 3. Super Bowl party here I come. (I have never been so excited for the Super Bowl) 4. I can go to Target for an hour if I want to. 5. I get to have lunch with a friend at the Tea Room tomorrow. 6. I can do light household chores (AGAIN- Never been so excited to do laundry or empty the dishwasher) With all of this said, I do need to continue to take it easy. I have been warned that I am weak and fragile from 10 weeks of lying on a couch, which means I need to be cautious about how much I add to my day. In all reality I am just so excited to sit up. The indigestion from lying down to eat was really getting to me. I think I now own half of the Tums company as I have made my way through millions of bottles of nasty chalkiness. I have an appointment scheduled for Friday the 13th (ahhhhh) in which it is possible I will deliver around that time. So Amber, Sarah, Cindy and Sandy there is a very high chance that one of you will share a birthday with our baby. We continue to be in awe that we have made it this far and thank you again for the many many thoughts and prayers you have given on our behalf. I will continue to update this blog and as soon as there is news of a baby, we will also post that here. So stayed tuned!

I cheated!

Yes, you read right, I cheated. I couldn't take it anymore. I stood in the kitchen for 15 minutes today and wiped down the counters and rinsed some dishes. I can hear you gasping now. I just had to get up, I was going crazy. Now I have to deal with Paul when he comes home and wonders why the kitchen is so clean. But really, the crumbs on the counter and in the microwave were beginning to drive me insane. So you see, it just had to be done. I will do better tomorrow, I promise.

Friday Appointment

Good news again. I continue to be stable and today the words "lifting bed rest" were uttered! On Wednesday of next week I will be 34 weeks and when I go for my regular Friday appointment as long as I continue to be stable, "some" of my restrictions will be lifted. Oh the joy of actually sitting up to eat, or walking around the house more than once, or just sitting up in general. What has seemed to far away is now finally feeling a little closer. I may even be able to get out for a Super Bowl party. I can't even imagine.

Good Morning Ameria!!!!!!!!!

So this morning Paul and I were watching Good Morning America and good ol' Dr. Oz was presenting some information about chronic pain and recovery. He said that for each day you are in bed it will take 10 days to recovery. I literally started to laugh out loud. Bursts of laughter! So far I have been on this couch for 63 days. You do the math. :)

5 Truths

1. Pain CAN make you stronger, if you let it.
2. Self condemnation does nothing for yourself.
3. Shadows prevent one from moving forward but are often necessary in healing.
4. Control can be defined in different ways.
5. You can question, scream and even walk away from God- but what is true will always rise above.

Another Friday Appointment

Another Friday appointment and again another stable day at the doctor's office. It was time for the fetal fibronectin test and I will make sure to post the results tomorrow after we find out. Today we also got to go to RMH and pre-register at the hospital. This was a pretty amazing feeling after all of these weeks of waiting. Thank you again for the mulititudes of prayers, thoughts and e-mails over the past 8 weeks! We continue to anticipate and look forward to the end of this unique journey.

31 Weeks

31 Weeks. It is hard to believe that I am still here on this couch. Tomorrow it will be 7 weeks of lying on this coach, that is 49 days, or 1,176 hrs or one bizillion million minutes. :) The best news is that at week 34 I will be allowed to sit up and move around a little more. That is only 3 weeks away and you better believe I am holding on to that one to get me through the next few days. This week my mom is here and she has been an amazing help. The nursery we were so reticent to complete is taking shape and slowly our thoughts are turning to a new journey in our lives.

A Negative can be a positive thing

The test results are in again and they were negative. This means no delivery for two more weeks, which puts us at 32 1/2 weeks. Great news again. I have to say that I am feeling much much more calm and at peace. 32 weeks is another huge goal for babies that can be born early. Now that the holidays are over I am looking forward to spring.

On another note . . . I had two different friends lose a parent this holiday season to cancer. Knowing how hard grief can be, think of them as you spend time with your families this season.

Friday- Another Appointment

Today was another appointment. I am starting to feel like all I do is go to the doctor anymore. :) However, it does bring peace of mind. Again there were no changes and the doctors are very encouraged at how long I have been stable. I will write with another update tomorrow after I call to get the test results of the fetal fibronectin test we did today. Thank you again for the constant stream of thoughts and prayers.